A
I can’t remember the first time one of my children told me, “I hate you.” I can, however, tell you that it still happens occasionally, but it doesn’t bother me. As their father, I often say things that are unpopular. If they hate me once in a while, I know I’m doing a good job.
There are three other words that I won’t allow in my house, however. Last week, I was watching my older son play with a paper airplane. After he accidentally threw it into a wall and it came apart, his eyes welled up with tears.
“I hate myself,” he said. It wasn’t the first time he’d said it, and I was concerned that he’d started to actually believe it.
I knelt down next to him and made him look into my eyes. I told him that I never wanted to hear those words again, and that he needed to respect himself.
The difference between your kid telling you they hate you and them saying they hate themselves is that, five minutes later, they’ve already forgotten they “hate you”. Self-hate is much more potentially poisonous and for young people, it can linger into the rest of their life.
Kids who start to believe they hate themselves sometimes struggle to form new friendships. As teenagers, they avoid the chance to connect with a potential love interest, because they assume they’ll be rejected. And as adults, they might choose not to apply for the dream job because they assume it won’t work out.
I know this is true, because I didn’t have a high opinion of myself as a child. I found myself struggling in many areas, and I’d hate to see my children suffer the same fate.
Sometimes, words are just words. But some words can make the kind of impact I’d very much like to avoid for my children. I don’t fear strong language; I fear language that makes us weak.
21.How did the author feel on hearing his kids saying “I hate you”?
A.Depressed. B.Annoyed. C.Unconcerned. D.Excited.
22.Why won’t the author allow the three words “I hate myself”?
A.Because the impact of thinking in this way is negative.
B.Because it hurts parents to hear their kids saying so.
C.Because it doesn’t make any sense to blame oneself.
D.Because the impoliteness of saying so is unbearable.
23.Which of the following can replace the underlined word “linger” in paragraph 5?
A.come to an end B.continue to exist
C.begin to change D.become out of date